Tommy was stumbling through the forest, completely drunk, when he came across a minister baptizing people in the river. Without much thought, he waded into the water, accidentally bumping into the minister. The minister, overwhelmed by the stench of alcohol, turned to him and asked, “Son, are you ready to find Jesus?”
Tommy yelled, “Yes, sir, I am!”
So, the minister grabbed him and dunked him into the river. Lifting him back up, he asked, “Did you find Jesus, my brother?” Tommy shook his head and replied, “Nope, didn’t find him!”
Surprised by the answer, the minister dunked him again, this time holding him under a little longer. Pulling him up once more, he asked, “Have you found Jesus yet?” Tommy, still gasping for breath, said, “No, not yet!”
By now, the minister was losing patience. He dunked Tommy one last time, holding him underwater for a good half a minute. When Tommy began flailing his arms and legs, the minister pulled him up and, with a frustrated tone, asked, “For heaven’s sake, have you found Jesus yet?”
Tommy, coughing up water, rubbed his eyes and said, “Are you sure this is where he went under?”