The Lumberjack’s Mysterious Party

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One day, a city stockbroker decides he’s had enough. The pressure, the fast pace, and the constant noise of the big city were all too much. So, he quits his job, leaves his apartment behind, and rents a remote cabin deep in the wilderness. For six peaceful months, he enjoys solitude and calm.

Then one day, there’s a knock at his door.

When he opens it, he sees a massive lumberjack with a thick beard, shifting awkwardly from one foot to the other. After a moment of hesitation, the lumberjack speaks.

“I’m your neighbor from the cabin about a mile down the road. I’m having a party this Saturday and thought I’d invite you.”

The man pauses, then responds, “You know what? That sounds great. I’ve been needing to get out and meet some new people. I’ll be there.”

The lumberjack nods and, looking slightly relieved, says, “Alright, see you around eight on Saturday.”

Just as he’s about to leave, he pauses and turns back, “Oh, I should mention, there’s gonna be some heavy drinking.”

The man shrugs, “No problem. I used to handle my liquor pretty well in the city, so I’m sure I can keep up.”

The lumberjack nods again, “Right. See you at eight.”

But once more, he stops and turns back, scratching his beard, “I should also warn you, there’s probably gonna be some fighting.”

The man hesitates but then says, “Well, I get along with most people, but if things get rough, I can handle myself.”

“Good to know,” says the lumberjack. “See you at eight then.”

But before leaving, the lumberjack pauses yet again and adds, “Oh, and just so you’re aware, there might be some wild se..x., too.”

The man, now a bit more intrigued, says, “Well, we’re all adults. After months out here by myself, I wouldn’t mind some company, if you know what I mean.”

The lumberjack nods once more. “Alright, see you Saturday.”

As the lumberjack walks away, the man calls after him, “Wait, one last thing—what should I wear?”

The lumberjack scratches his beard, thinking for a moment, then says, “Doesn’t really matter. It’s just gonna be you and me.”